Whatever the reason, a woman suddenly found herself in front of a fait accompli. Her
husband said that she was as his mother, which meant he would never sleep with her any more. She knew her husband meant what he said. She knew that was a common practise in her community. So what
did she do? Well, she didn't resign herself to it. She didn't solicit the services of a witch. She simply decided to speak up against this practise which she deemed unjust. How?
Well, she didn't run to the village center and start screaming. She went to God's Messenger (pbuh) and spoke to him about her problem. And this is what happened next:
"Allah hath heard the saying of her that disputeth with thee (Muhammad) concerning
her husband, and complaineth unto Allah. And Allah heareth your colloquy. Lo! Allah is Nearer, Knower. Such of you as put away your wives (by saying they are as their mothers) They are not their
mothers; none are their mothers except those who gave them birth; they indeed utter an ill word and a lie. And lo! Allah is Forgiving, Merciful." (Al-Mujadila : 1-2)
Not only did that good woman solve her own problem, but she also saved so many other women who had been suffering from the same practise. Moreover, she taught us how to solve our
own problems wherever and whenever we may be. She taught us to seek solutions in God's Message. In her lifetime, she could go and speak to the Prophet (pbuh). That is no more possible. But the
Prophet (pbuh) said : "I have left for you something that if you cling to it you will never err after [my death] – [that is,] Allah's book [the Koran] and my Sunna." And here is the
Koran. It's available in cheap books.
It's available free on the Web.
"Lo! this Quran guideth unto that which is straightest, and giveth tidings unto the believers who do good works that theirs will be a great
reward." (Al-Isra : 9) This Koran is a "clear indication for mankind, and a guidance and a mercy for a folk whose faith is
sure." (Al-Jathiya : 20) God reveals "of the Quran that which is a healing and a mercy for believers" (Al-Isra : 82) So why
not turn to the Koran even as an act of last resort--all the more so as "No calamity befalleth save by Allah's leave. And whosoever believeth in Allah,
He guideth his heart. And Allah is Knower of all things." (At-Tagaboun : 11)
How could we ever find a solution to our problem(s) if we turn away from God who says to us: "Allah would explain to you and guide you by the examples of those who were before you, and would turn to you in mercy. Allah is Knower, Wise. And Allah would turn to you in
mercy; but those who follow vain desires would have you go tremendously astray. Allah would make the burden light for you, for man was created weak." (An-Nisaa :
26-28)
God said to Moses and his brother "Go, both of you, unto Pharaoh. Lo! he hath transgressed (the bounds). And speak unto him a gentle word, that peradventure
he may heed or fear. They said: Our Lord! Lo! we fear that he may be beforehand with us or that he may play the tyrant. He said: Fear not. Lo! I am with
you twain, Hearing and Seeing." (Ta-ha : 43-46) And God was not only with Moses and his brother. "Hast thou not seen that Allah
knoweth all that is in the heavens and all that is in the earth? There is no secret conference of three but He is their fourth, nor of five but He is their sixth, nor of less than that or more
but He is with them wheresoever they may be; and afterward, on the Day of Resurrection, He will inform them of what they did. Lo! Allah is Knower of all things." (Al-Mujadila : 7)
How could we find solutions far away from God who "is Knower of all things"?
But what should we expect of God? Well, He taught us in those verses above! God could have destroyed Pharaoh, but He instead chose to send Moses to him that he may guide him on a right
path. He said : "And speak unto him a gentle word, that peradventure he may heed or fear." God gives us the ability to act and choose and decide for ourselves and does not do everything in our place. "And if Allah willed He
could have punished them (without you) but (thus it is ordained) that He may try some of you by means of others." (Muhammad : 4) So while seeking God's help and guidance we
will always have to make use of our minds and own (available) means to try and solve our problems. What God gave us in the Koran is great already. For it is evident that to solve a problem
you have to understand it first, and the Koran does help us understand our problems if we read it carefully.
Let's read this, for example: "They will ask thee of Dhul-Qarneyn. Say: I shall recite unto you a remembrance of him. Lo! We made him strong in the land and
gave unto every thing a road. And he followed a road Till, when he reached the setting place of the sun, he found it setting in a muddy spring, and found a people thereabout: We said: O
Dhul-Qarneyn! Either punish or show them kindness. He said: As for him who doeth wrong, we shall punish him, and then he will be brought back
unto his Lord, who will punish him with awful punishment! But as for him who believeth and doeth right, good will be his reward, and We shall speak unto him a mild command. Then he followed a
road Till, when he reached the rising place of the sun, he found it rising on a people for whom We had appointed no helper therefrom. So (it
was). And We knew all concerning him. Then he followed a road Till, when he came between the two mountains, he found upon their hither side a folk
that scarce could understand a saying. They said: O Dhul-Qarneyn! Lo! Gog and Magog are spoiling the land. So may we pay thee tribute on
condition that thou set a barrier between us and them? He said: That wherein my Lord hath established me better (than your tribute). Do but help me with strength (of men), I will set between you
and them a bank. Give me pieces of iron till, when he had levelled up (the gap) between the cliffs, he said: Blow! till, when he had made it
a fire, he said: Bring me molten copper to pour thereon. And (Gog and Magog) were not able to surmount, nor could they pierce (it). He said: This is a mercy from my Lord; but when the promise of
my Lord cometh to pass, He will lay it low, for the promise of my Lord is true." (Al-Kahf : 83-98)
This is a wonderful example of how God does respect man's freedom of choice. "We said: O Dhul-Qarneyn! Either punish or show them kindness. He said: As for him who doeth wrong, we shall punish him, and then he will be brought back unto his Lord, who will punish him with awful
punishment! But as for him who believeth and doeth right, good will be his reward, and We shall speak unto him a mild command. " And God accepted
that (wise) reply. But Dhul-Qarneyn did not accept the offer from the people who feared Gog and Magog. "He said: That wherein my Lord hath established
me better (than your tribute)." And what did he do next to help those people? Well, he
didn't sit down and burst into prayer. He didn't wait for God to tell him what to do. He started work immediately. He solicited everybody to contribute to his project. He used
his mind to design the project, but he also used the physical strength of the men who couldn't use their minds properly. And when the project was realized (thanks to everybody's
contributions), "He said: This is a mercy from my Lord"!
Dhul-Qarneyn did not ascribe his achievement to his own intellectual powers because he was of those who understood what Abraham (pbuh) meant by saying to his people: "Allah hath created you and what ye make?" (As-Saffat : 96) He was not of those who would say
:"I have been given it only on account of knowledge I possess." (Al-Qasas : 78) And that's the fruit of the trust that there has always been
between God and those who believe in Him and respect His Word. Haven't you read this verse which says: "So keep your duty to Allah as best ye
can"? Who on earth can ever tell me whether or not I have kept my duty to Allah (swt) as best I could? It's, therefore, a matter of trust. If I trust God,
God will trust me. And what does God want of me, after all, if not to act lawfully for my own good? Listen to what God says to you and me: "So keep your duty
to Allah as best ye can, and listen, and obey, and spend; that is better for your souls. And whoso is saved from his own greed, such are the
successful." (At-Tagaboun : 16)
See? God wants you and me to be successful! That's all. That's why He warns us. That's why He guides us.
"O ye who believe! Lo! among your wives and your children there are enemies for you, therefor beware of
them. And if ye efface and overlook and forgive, then lo! Allah is Forgiving, Merciful. Your wealth and your
children are only a temptation, whereas Allah! with Him is an immense reward." (At-Tagaboun : 14-15) "O ye who believe! Let not your
wealth nor your children distract you from remembrance of Allah. Those who do so, they are the losers." (Al-Munafiqun : 9)
We all love the world. Who would not like to live happily with a loving spouse and lovely children in a splendid home?
"Beautified for mankind is love of the joys (that come) from women and offspring, and stored up
heaps of gold and silver, and horses branded (with their mark), and cattle and land." But "That is comfort of the life of the world. Allah!
With Him is a more excellent abode. Say: Shall I inform you of something better than that? For those who keep from evil, with their Lord, are Gardens underneath which rivers flow, and pure
companions, and contentment from Allah. Allah is Seer of His bondmen" (Al-i'Imran : 14-15) "Lo! We have placed all that is in the earth as an
ornament thereof that we may try them: which of them is best in conduct." (Al-Kahf : 7) "Nay, but ye do
love the fleeting Now And neglect the Hereafter." (Al-Qiyamat : 20-21) And that's the mistake we shouldn't make.
"Say: Shall We inform you who will be the greatest losers
by their works? Those whose effort goeth astray in the life of the world, and yet they reckon that they do good work. Those are they who disbelieve in the revelations of their Lord and in the
meeting with Him. Therefor their works are vain, and on the Day of Resurrection We assign no weight to them." (Al-Kahf : 103-105)
Would it be worth it to win the World's respect and lose God's esteem? Would it be wise to let
"Rivalry in worldly increase distracteth you Until ye come to the graves"? (At-Takathur
: 1-2)
And then "Whoso desireth the reward of the world, (let him know that) with Allah is the
reward of the world and the Hereafter. Allah is ever Hearer, Seer." (An-Nisaa : 134) "But seek
the abode of the Hereafter in that which Allah hath given thee and neglect not thy portion of the world, and be thou kind even as Allah hath been kind to thee, and seek not corruption in the
earth; lo! Allah loveth not corrupters" (Al-Qasas : 77)
Innocent Whispers
What should the life of a good Muslim man be like? Well, let's see what the Koran says about it.
"And We have commended unto man kindness toward parents. His
mother beareth him with reluctance, and bringeth him forth with reluctance, and the bearing of him and the weaning of him is thirty months, till, when he attaineth full strength and reacheth
forty years, he saith: My Lord! Arouse me that I may give thanks for the favor wherewith Thou hast favored me and my parents, and that I may do right acceptable unto Thee. And be gracious unto
me In the matter of my seed. Lo! I have turned unto Thee repentant, and lo! I am of those who surrender (unto Thee). Those are they from whom We accept the best of what they do, and overlook
their evil deeds. (They are) among the owners of the Garden. This is the true promise which they were promised (in the world)." (Al-Ahqaf : 15-16)
This implies that by the age of forty a man should be fulfilled, i.e., he should have a home, a wife and children, among other things. If we look around us, that's
what we find. Most men marry and beget children even before the age of forty.
But what if a man reached forty years and yet had no home of his own, no wife, no children? Would that be a sign of failure, a curse, or what? In society, yes,
that's a sign of failure. Why should a man be called a man if he could not start a family before the age of forty? There's certainly something wrong with him!
Now, what could be "wrong" with such a man? It could be a matter of money. It could be a matter of choice. In either case, the Koran says:
"And let those who cannot find a match keep chaste till Allah give them independence by His
grace." (An-Nur : 33)
But for how long, one would ask? How long can a single man keep chaste? How long can a man keep hope?
Well, marriage is not the end of the road, to begin with. Many married men divorce their wives. Many married men complain about their children for
various reasons. Many men don't have children in the first place.
So what if a man hastened to marry just to please society and then his wife turned out to be the wrong choice? How long would he tolerate that? What if he
found just the right spouse, but then he failed to have children because he or she was barren? How long would he keep hope before he could be blessed with a child? Would he divorce his barren
wife just to please society? Well, good men don't do that.
"A mention of the mercy of thy Lord unto His servant Zachariah. When he cried unto his Lord a cry in secret, Saying: My Lord! Lo! the bones of me wax
feeble and my head is shining with grey hair, and I have never been unblest in prayer to Thee, my Lord. Lo! I fear my kinsfolk after me, since my wife is barren. Oh, give me from Thy presence a
successor Who shall inherit of me and inherit (also) of the house of Jacob. And make him, my Lord, acceptable (unto Thee). (It was said unto him): O Zachariah! Lo! We bring thee tidings of a
son whose name is John; We have given the same name to none before (him)." (Maryam : 2-6)
Why did Zachariah (pbuh) resort to du'a (invocations to God)? Why didn't he do just as Henry VIII of England ? He didn't do so because he believed that the fact that his wife was barren wasn't her
fault, but rather a matter of Fate. He knew that getting married and begetting children were not personal achievements to pride oneself on, but rather a gift from God. That's why he said :
"give me from Thy presence a successor ..." He knew
that he could not force the hand of Fate.
"Unto Allah belongeth the sovereignty of the heavens and the earth. He createth what He will. He bestoweth female (offspring) upon whom He will, and
bestoweth male (offspring) upon whom He will; Or He mingleth them, males and females, and He maketh barren whom He will. Lo! He is Knower, Powerful." (Ash-Shura : 49-50)
But did Zachariah (pbuh) really expect God to give him a son at such an old age? We don't know. All we know is that he sounded surprised to learn that he would get a son even now
that he reached infirm old age!
"He said: My Lord! How can I have a son when my wife is barren and I have reached infirm old age? He said: So (it will be). Thy Lord saith: It is easy for Me, even as I created thee
before, when thou wast naught." (Maryam : 7-9)
That was not the first time such "a strange thing" happened. It had happened once before to Ibrahim (pbuh).
"They said: Be not afraid! Lo! we bring thee good tidings of a boy possessing wisdom. He said: Bring ye me good tidings (of
a son) when old age hath overtaken me? Of what then can ye bring good tidings? They said: We bring thee good tidings in truth. So be not thou of the despairing. He said: And who despaireth of
the mercy of his Lord save those who are astray?" (Al-Hijr : 53-56)
"And his wife, standing by, laughed when We gave her good tidings (of the birth) of Isaac, and, after Isaac, of Jacob. She said: Oh, woe is me! Shall I
bear a child when I am an old woman, and this my husband is an old man? Lo! this is a strange thing! They said: Wonderest thou at the commandment of Allah? The mercy of Allah and His blessings
be upon you, O people of the house! Lo! He is Owner of Praise, Owner of Glory!" (Hud : 71-73)
For people like Zachariah and Ibrahim, the difference between believing and knowing doesn't matter much when it comes to matters of Faith. These people know what
they believe in, and if they don't know, they ask questions while sticking to their belief.
"And when Abraham said (unto his Lord): My lord! Show me how Thou givest life to the dead, He said: Dost thou not
believe? Abraham said: Yea, but (I ask) in order that my heart may be at ease. (His Lord) said: Take four of the birds and cause them to incline unto thee, then place a part of them on
each hill, then call them, they will come to thee in haste. And know that Allah is Mighty, Wise." (Al-Baqara : 260)
"And make mention of Mary in the Scripture, when she had withdrawn from her people to a chamber looking East, And had chosen seclusion from them. Then We
sent unto her Our spirit and it assumed for her the likeness of a perfect man. She said: Lo! I seek refuge in the Beneficent One from thee, if thou art God fearing. He said: I am only a
messenger of thy Lord, that I may bestow on thee a faultless son. She said: How can I have a son when no mortal hath touched me, neither have I been
unchaste! He said: So (it will be). Thy Lord saith: It is easy for Me. And (it will be) that We may make of him a revelation for mankind and a mercy from Us, and it is a thing
ordained." (16-21)
The problem is not with those people. The problem is with us, with most of us--at least. We know for sure that it's only God Who can decide our fate, and yet we
don't want to believe in that--just out of arrogance. We continue to disbelieve in what we know is the Truth until we get caught in a situation where we give up our arrogance and burst
into tears and prayers, imploring God to save us.
"He it is Who maketh you to go on the land and the sea till, when ye are in the ships and they sail with them with a fair
breeze and they are glad therein, a storm wind reacheth them and the wave cometh unto them from every side and they deem that they are overwhelmed therein; (then) they cry unto Allah, making
their faith pure for Him only; If Thou deliver us from this, we truly will be of the thankful. Yet when He hath delivered them, behold! they rebel in the
earth wrongfully. O mankind! Your rebellion is only against yourselves. (Ye have) enjoyment of the life of the world; then unto Us is your return and We shall proclaim unto you what ye used to
do." (Yunus : 22-23)
"Hast thou not seen how the ships glide on the sea by Allah's grace, that He may show you of His wonders? Lo! therein indeed are portents for every
steadfast, grateful (heart). And if a wave enshroudeth them like awnings, they cry unto Allah, making their faith pure for Him only. But when He bringeth them safe to land, come of them
compromise. None denieth Our signs save every traitor ingrate." (Luqman : 31-32)
"And when harm toucheth you upon the sea, all unto whom ye cry (for succour) fail save Him (alone), but when He
bringeth you safe to land, ye turn away, for man was ever thankless. Feel ye then secure that He will not cause a slope of the land to engulf you, or send a sandstorm, upon you, and then ye
will find that ye have no protector? Or feel ye secure that He will not return you to that (plight) a second time, and send against you a
hurricane of wind and drown you for your thanklessness, and then ye will not find therein that ye have any avenger against Us?" (Al-Isra : 67-69)
"Say: Can ye see yourselves, if the punishment of Allah come upon you or the Hour come upon you, calling upon other than Allah? Do ye then call (for help)
to any other than Allah? (Answer that) if ye are truthful. Nay, but unto Him ye call, and He removeth that because of which ye call unto Him, if He will, and ye forget whatever partners ye ascribed unto Him." (Al-An'am
: 40-41)
Now, where does our arrogance come from? It comes from our desire to show off. We want to show people around us that we are self-independent, we are the best. We
want the world to know that we got our job because, as they say, "one Scotsman's worth 3 Englishmen". Idem for one's spouse. Idem for one's children. Idem for one's fortune. It's all the fruit
of our ambition. It's all a matter of merit.
By the way, wasn't Zachariah (pbuh) an ambitious man? Wasn't Ibrahim (pbuh) an ambitious man? Well, the answer would depend on what we mean by ambition! If
ambition means the desire to attain glory, power, social success, etc., I don't think Zachariah (pbuh) and Ibrahim (pbuh) were that kind of person to have such a desire. If ambition means
aspiration for a noble goal, a strong will to please God (and save humanity from evil) with deeds that would continue even after one's death, then, definitely, there's no doubt Zachariah
(pbuh) and Ibrahim (pbuh) were just that kind of men. And that's what God wants good Muslim men to be like. How? Well, let's see this first:
"Or deemest thou that the People of the Cave and the Inscription are a wonder among Our portents? When the young men fled for refuge to the Cave and said:
Our Lord! Give us mercy from Thy presence and shape for us right conduct in our plight, And in like manner We disclosed them (to the people of the city) that they might know that the promise of Allah is true, and that, as for the Hour, there is no doubt concerning it. When (the people of the city) disputed of their case among
themselves, they said: Build over them a building; their Lord knoweth best concerning them. Those who won their point said: We verity shall build a place of worship over
them." (...) "And say not of anything: Lo! I shall do that tomorrow, Except if Allah will. And
remember thy Lord when thou forgettest, and say: It may be that my Lord guideth me unto a nearer way of truth than this." (Al-Kahf : 9-24) "And (it is said) they tarried in their Cave three hundred years and add nine. Say: Allah is best aware how long they tarried. His is the Invisible of the heavens and the
earth. How clear of sight is He and keen of hearing! They have no protecting friend beside Him, and He maketh none to share in His government." (Al-Kahf : 25-26)
See? These good young men left the city (with all its glamour) and took refuge in a cave. And it is clear from those verses above that God liked these young men.
And yet God did not look at what these young men had "achieved" in their lives (or at what they looked liked). ("And thou wouldst have deemed them
waking thou they were asleep, and we caused them to turn over to the right and the left, and their dog stretching out his paws on the threshold. If
thou hadst observed them closely thou hadst assuredly turned away from them in flight, and hadst been filled with awe of them." (Al-Kahf : 18)) God rather looked at what was in these young men's hearts. God praised what was in the young men's hearts and did not praise "the achievements" of their people back in the
city--just as the Queen of Sheba did not praise Suleiman for the wonders of his palace, but praised God instead. It was not the Queen's eyes that spoke (when "It was said unto her: Enter the hall. And when she saw it she deemed it a pool and bared her legs. (Solomon) said: Lo! it is a hall, made smooth, of glass. She said: My Lord! Lo! I have wronged myself, and I surrender with Solomon unto Allah, the Lord of the Worlds." (An-Naml : 44)), but it was rather her heart that uttered those words of truth. That's why the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said: "Allah does not look at your bodies nor does
he look at your images, but He looks into your hearts." The true "civilisation" is in the hearts of people, not in their buildings and constructions. The true power is in the hearts, not
in the bodies.
"He said: O chiefs! Which of you will bring me her throne before they come unto me, surrendering? A stalwart of the Jinn said: I will bring it
thee before thou canst rise from thy place. Lo! I verily am strong and trusty for such work. One with whom was knowledge of the Scripture said: I will
bring it thee before thy gaze returneth unto thee. And when he saw it set in his presence, (Solomon) said: This is of the bounty of my Lord, that He may try me whether I give thanks or
am ungrateful. Whosoever giveth thanks he only giveth thanks for (the good of) his own soul: and whosoever is ungrateful (is ungrateful only to his own soul's hurt). For lo! my Lord is Absolute
in independence, Bountiful." (An-Naml : 38-40)
But does this mean that God wants good men to be wretched homeless people going around begging disbelievers on the street? Does God want good men to live in caves,
far away from towns and cities? No, far from it.
Innocent Whispers
"He giveth wisdom unto whom He will, and he unto whom wisdom is given, he truly hath received abundant good, But none remember except men of understanding." (Al-Baqara : 269)
"Say (unto them, O Muhammad): Are those who know equal with those who know not? But only men of understanding will pay heed." (Az-Zumar : 9)
God wants you to care even about your appearance.
"Is he who goeth groping on his face more rightly guided, or he who walketh upright on a beaten road?" (Al-Mulk : 22)
God does not want to see you shabby, certainly not while praying Him. Nor does He want you to starve for the sake of Him.
"O Children of Adam! Look to your adornment at every place of worship, and eat and drink, but be not prodigal. Lo! He loveth not the prodigals. Say: Who hath forbidden the adornment of Allah which He hath brought forth for His bondmen, and the good things of His providing? Say: Such, on the Day of Resurrection, will be only for those who believed during the life of the world. Thus do We detail Our revelations for people who have knowledge. Say: My Lord forbiddeth only indecencies, such of them as are apparent and such as are within, and sin and wrongful oppression, and that ye associate with Allah that for which no warrant hath been revealed, and that ye tell concerning Allah that which ye know not." (Al-A'raf : 31-33)
God wants you to be honest, free from contradictions, fair in your judgement.
"As for man, whenever his Lord trieth him by honoring him, and is gracious unto him, he saith: My Lord honoureth me. But whenever He trieth him by straitening his means of life, he saith: My Lord despiseth me. Nay, but ye (for your part) honor not the orphan, And urge not on the feeding of the poor, And ye devour heritages with devouring greed, And love wealth with abounding love." (Al-Fajr : 15-20)
See? You can't have everything you want without anything in return. Look around you: if you are well off, others are poor and in need of your help, and so on and so forth. If you are poor yourself and need others to help you, ask yourself why but don't be quick to take offence. You may have one or two things that many others don't have. "And if ye would count the favor of Allah ye cannot reckon it. Lo! Allah is indeed Forgiving, Merciful." (An-Nahl : 18)
If you have the means, God would want you to be kind to mankind as He has been kind to you:
"But seek the abode of the Hereafter in that which Allah hath given thee and neglect not thy portion of the world, and be thou kind even as Allah hath been kind to thee, and seek not corruption in the earth; lo! Allah loveth not corrupters" (Al-Qasas : 77)
Your belief in God entails a responsibility on your part, otherwise you'll be of those of whom God said: "And when it is said unto them: Spend of that wherewith Allah hath provided you, those who disbelieve say unto those who believe: Shall we feed those whom Allah, if He willed, would feed? Ye are in naught else than error manifest." (Ya-Sin : 47)
You may ask that very question yourself. And the answer you get -if you truly are a believer- is this: "Every soul must taste of death, and We try you with evil and with good, for ordeal. And unto Us ye will be returned." (Al-Anbiyaa : 35) This means that God may try you with evil just as He may try you with good. So no wonder some men will be poor all their lives, and some men will be disabled all their lives. Being poor or disabled may mean a lower social status, but in God's sight there's no difference between poor and rich, abled and disabled. They are all God's bondmen, but they are tried with different things. A good deed from a rich, healthy man is the same as a good deed from a poor, disabled man. Idem for ill deeds. It is, therefore, only God Who decides who should be poor and who should be rich.
"Is it they who apportion their Lord's mercy? We have apportioned among them their livelihood in the life of the world, and raised some of them above others in rank that some of them may take labor from others; and the mercy of thy Lord is better than (the wealth) that they amass. And were it not that mankind would have become one community, We might well have appointed, for those who disbelieve in the Beneficent, roofs of silver for their houses and stairs (of silver) whereby to mount, And for their houses doors (of silver) and couches of silver whereon to recline, And ornaments of gold. Yet all that would have been but a provision of the life of the world. And the Hereafter with your Lord would have been for those who keep from evil." (Az-Zukhruf : 32-35)
"And they say: We are more (than you) in wealth and children. We are not the punished!
Say (O Muhammad): Lo! my Lord enlargeth the provision for whom He will and narroweth it (for whom He will). But most of mankind know not. And it is not your wealth nor your children that will bring you near unto Us, but he who believeth and doeth good (he draweth near). As for such, theirs will be twofold reward for what they did, and they will dwell secure in lofty halls." (Saba : 35-37)
"He frowned and turned away Because the blind man came unto him. What could inform thee but that he might grow (in grace) Or take heed and so the reminder might avail him? As for him who thinketh himself independent, Unto him thou payest regard. Yet it is not thy concern if he grow not (in grace). But as for him who cometh unto thee with earnest purpose And hath fear, From him thou art distracted. Nay, but verily it is an Admonishment, So let whosoever will pay heed to it" (Abasa : 1-12)
Does this mean, though, that a poor man should accept his state of poverty as something fated for him and not try to improve his living conditions? No! On the contrary, a poor man should try again and again and never despair of God's mercy, and never consider himself as doomed to remain poor all his life. Being rich is not a sin, just as being poor is not a curse per se.
Some of the Companions of the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said to the Prophet (peace be upon him): "O Messenger of Allah, the affluent have made off with the rewards: they pray as we pray, they fast as we fast, and they give away in charity the superfluity of their wealth." The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Has not Allah made things for you to give away in charity? Truly every tasbiha is a charity, every takbira is a charity, every tahmida is a charity and every tahlila is a charity; to enjoin a good action is a charity, to forbid an evil action is a charity and in a sexual act each of you there are a charity." They said: "O Messenger of Allah, when one of us fulfils his sexual desire will he have some reward for that?" The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Do you [not] think that were he to act upon it unlawfully he would be sinning? Likewise, if he has acted upon it lawfully he will have a reward."
Abu Hurairah narrated that Abu Dharr said to the Messenger of Allah (pbuh): "The wealthy people have all the rewards; they pray as we pray; they fast as we fast; and they have surplus wealth which they give in charity; but we have no wealth which we may give in charity." Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) said: "Abu Dharr, should I not teach you phrases by which you acquire the rank of those who excel you? No one can acquire your rank except one who acts like you. [...] Say Allahu Akbar thirty-three times; and say Alhamdulillah (Praise be to Allah) thirty-three times; and say SubhanAllah (Glory be to Allah) thirty-three times; and end it by saying, Laa ilaaha illallahu wahdahu la shareeka lahu, lahul mulku wa lahul hamdu yuhyi wa yomeetu wa Huwa ‘ala kulli shayin Qadeer. (There is no god but Allah alone, He has no partner, to Him belongs the Kingdom, to Him praise is due and He has power over everything.) Your sins will be forgiven, even if they are like the foam of the sea."
Sometimes we know all this and yet we make as if we have never heard of it. We behave as if we were the masters of our lives. Instead of seeking God's pleasure, we want God to please us with good things. And if God does "please" us with good things, do we give thanks to Him?
"Man tireth not of praying for good, and if ill toucheth him, then he is disheartened, desperate. And verily, if We cause him to taste mercy after some hurt that hath touched him, he will say: This is my own; and I deem not that the Hour will ever rise, and if I am brought back to my Lord, I surely shall be better off with Him, But We verily shall tell those who disbelieve (all) that they did, and We verily shall make them taste hard punishment; When We show favor unto man, he withdraweth and turneth aside, but when ill toucheth him then he aboundeth in prayer." (Fussilat : 49-51)
But not all men do this. Men are not all ungrateful.
"And if We cause man to taste some mercy from Us and afterward withdraw it from him, lo! he is despairing, thankless. And if We cause him to taste grace after some misfortune that had befallen him, he saith: The ills have gone from me. Lo! he is exultant, boastful; Save those who persevere and do good works. Theirs will be forgiveness and a great reward." (Hud : 9-11)
"Lo! man was created anxious, Fretful when evil befalleth him, And, when good befalleth him, grudging; Save worshippers Who are constant at their worship And in whose wealth there is a right acknowledged For the beggar and the destitute; And those who believe in the Day of Judgment, And those who are fearful of their Lord's doom. Lo! the doom of their Lord is that before which none can feel secure, And those who preserve their chastity Save with their wives and those whom their right hands possess, for thus they are not blameworthy; But whoso seeketh more than that, those are they who are transgressors; And those who keep their pledges and their covenant. And those who stand by their testimony And those who are attentive at their worship, These will dwell in Gardens, honored." (Al-Ma'arij : 19-35)
These are the men God likes. These are the true gentlemen who acknowledge and assume their responsibility. They give as much -if not more- than they receive. And yet they fear that God -for all His mercy and compassion- may not be pleased with them. They strive and keep striving to please God in whatever way possible. ("And of mankind is he who would sell himself, seeking the pleasure of Allah; and Allah hath compassion on (His) bondmen." (Al-Baqara : 207)) These men don't sit back with crossed arms and wait for God to do everything in their place. They look for creative ways to circumvent adversity, bearing in mind that they won't achieve except that which God has ordained. It's these people who know the meaning of God's words: "And say not of anything: Lo! I shall do that tomorrow, Except if Allah will. And remember thy Lord when thou forgettest, and say: It may be that my Lord guideth me unto a nearer way of truth than this." (Al-Kahf : 23-24) It's these men who understand that patience means "if you fail for the tenth time, try again". They understand what Jacob (pbuh) meant when he said : "O my sons, and ascertain concerning Joseph and his brother, and despair not of the Spirit of Allah. Lo! none despaireth of the Spirit of Allah save disbelieving folk." (Yusuf : 87) They're not of those of whom God said: "And among mankind is he who worshippeth Allah upon a narrow marge so that if good befalleth him he is content therewith, but if a trial befalleth him, he falleth away utterly. He loseth both the world and the Hereafter. That is the sheer loss." (Al-Hajj : 11)
But these men remain men, after all. They are human beings. So there's a limit to what they can stand, whatever the (high) level of their faith and (exceptional) degree of their sincerity. Even prophets experienced moments of weekness vis-à-vis society, because every man likes to be liked in society. No man would like others to speak ill of him.
Innocent Whispers
Is that all? Well, God said to the first Muslims:
"Assuredly ye will be tried in your property and in your persons, and ye will hear much wrong from those who were given the Scripture before you, and from the idolaters. But if ye persevere and ward off (evil), then that is of the steadfast heart of things." (Al-i'Imran : 186)
You say yes I can understand that when it comes from disbelievers, but the problem is I'm hearing much wrong from my fellow Muslims! What can I do? How can I feel strong in front of them? How can I stand shoulder to shoulder with other men when I can't even find words to explain my situation without lying to them? How can I persevere? How can I be an ambitious man when I see that people with less qualifications than me are by far better off than me? What's left for me to dream of at this age? That's my problem. My problem is not with the Scripture, it's with society.
Well, let's see what the Scripture says about it!
Here's Mary, a pious woman who has never been touched by a mortal. But now she's pregnant! How would society react when poor Mary comes out with a baby in her arms?
"And she conceived him, and she withdrew with him to a place. And the pangs of childbirth drove her unto the trunk of the palm tree. She said: Oh, would that I had died ere this and had become a thing of naught, forgotten!"
Mary wasn't a disbeliever, though. She had always led a virtuous life. She believed she had done nothing wrong, and yet she feared people's talk. She knew that society wouldn't be merciful towards her. So what could she do now that she had the pangs of childbirth? It's a tragedy, isn't it? But "Then (one) cried unto her from below her, saying: Grieve not! Thy Lord hath placed a rivulet beneath thee, And shake the trunk of the palm tree toward thee, thou wilt cause ripe dates to fall upon thee. So eat and drink and be consoled. And if thou meetest any mortal, say: Lo! I have vowed a fast unto the Beneficent, and may not speak this day to any mortal." (Maryam : 22-26) Now Mary had the yaqeen (absolute faith) that she was on the right path and therefore had absolutely nothing to fear from society. "Then she brought him to her own folk, carrying him. They said: O Mary! Thou hast come with an amazing thing. Oh sister of Aaron! Thy father was not a wicked man nor was thy mother a harlot." That was an understatement that Mary was a 'harlot'! So what did she do? Did she burst into tears? No. She faced her people and "Then she pointed to him. They said How can we tale to one who is in the cradle, a young boy? He spake: Lo! I am the slave of Allah. He hath given me the Scripture and hath appointed me a Prophet, (...)" (Maryam : 27-30)
So yaqeen saved Mary in this situation. But Mary was a woman. What about a man? Would it be easier for a man to face up to society? Not necessarily. Even a prophet could have difficulty facing up to society. The Koran relates this about the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh):
"And when thou saidst unto him on whom Allah hath conferred favor and thou hast conferred favor: Keep thy wife to thyself, and fear Allah. And thou didst hide in thy mind that which Allah was to bring to light, and thou didst fear mankind whereas Allah had a better right that thou shouldst fear Him. So when Zeyd had performed the necessary formality (of divorce) from her, We gave her unto thee in marriage, so that (henceforth) there may be no sin for believers in respect of wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have performed the necessary formality (of release) from them. The commandment of Allah must be fulfilled. There is no reproach for the Prophet in that which Allah maketh his due. That was Allah's way with those who passed away of old and the commandment of Allah is certain destiny. Who delivered the messages of Allah and feared Him, and feared none save Allah. Allah keepeth good account." (Al-Ahzab : 36-39)
God knew why the Prophet (pbuh) feared mankind and yet He let him go through that bitter experience (of fear and anxiety)--just as had happened with Mary, and, before her, with Abraham, who had seen himself in a dream cutting the throat of his only son). God knew what would happen to Lot. "And when Our messengers came unto Lot, he was distressed and knew not how to protect them. He said: This is a distressful day. And his people came unto him, running towards him and before then they used to commit abominations. He said: O my people! Here are my daughters! They are purer for you. Beware of Allah, and degrade me not in (the person of) my guests. Is there not among you any upright man? They said: Well thou knowest that we have no right to thy daughters, and well thou knowest what we want. He said: Would that I had strength to resist you or had some strong support (among you)!" (Hud : 77-88) God knew that Lot would be embarrassed. And Lot was embarrassed despite the fact that he was a prophet. But when his guests spoke to him about those people he quickly acquired yaqeen. " (The messengers) said: O Lot! Lo! we are messengers of thy Lord; they shall not reach thee. So travel with thy people in a part of the night, and let not one of you turn round (all) save thy wife. Lo! that which smiteth them will smite her (also). Lo! their tryst is (for) the morning. Is not the morning nigh?" (Hud : 81)
So why did God let those good people experience those feelings of fear and panic? Did God want to torment his bondmen who had devoted their lives to worshipping Him Alone? Did God not know that these people believed in Him and feared Him and would do everything to please Him? Of course, God knew all that. But we too know now that all those stories had a happy ending. And we now learn from those stories. We learn that we should know about the truths that are not conspicuous at first sight. We learn that we have to develop yaqeen while we are alright and in good shape and not wait until we are in an adversity. We learn that we should acquire yaqeen and know that we may need it as someone would like to have his savings in handy in the hour of adversity. But yaqeen is not a sura (chapter from the Koran) or invocations to be learnt by heart. Yaqeen is the fruit of both the knowledge we acquire by reading/listening/discussing, etc, and personal experience. Hence, the importance of reading and meditating about the stories in the Koran before, while and after going through a bad situation.
Now, what has this got to do with ambition? What has it got to do with losing one's job? Well, the link might not be evident, but it's there. Losing your job is one instance of hardship. If you lose your job you may need moral support until you find another job. Yaqeen will provide you with that moral support; it will give you (at least the strict minimum of) hope that you will find a new job. Your hardship is an occasion for you to strenghten your yaqeen and to think more about your life, about your goal in life: what do you live for? What do you want to achieve? Who is the role model you would like to emulate? Is your goal something special? or is it something that anybody around you (or many people) can achieve (such as getting married, begetting children, becoming a doctor...)?
Has your goal got anything to do with your faith (such as da'wa, for example)? If it has, then bear in mind that you will suffer--as all those who passed away before you suffered before they attained their hopes. Read this, if you like:
"Or think ye that ye will enter Paradise while yet there hath not come unto you the like of (that which came to) those who passed away before you? Affliction and adversity befell them, they were shaken as with earthquake, till the messenger (of Allah) and those who believed along with him said: When cometh Allah's help? Now surely Allah's help is nigh." (Al-Baqara : 214)
When we read stories about what happened to prophets, saints and devout people, then we can understand why gloom enshrouds us the moment we hear that we'll be laid off, or the moment we leave our workplace for the last time. Then we can understand why we can't stand before people who are lucky to keep their jobs without feeling some kind of shame or guilt. These are always hard moments, be we believers or disbelievers.
Innocent Whispers
These whispers may not answer your questions, unfortunately. But they were meant to help you find answers in the Koran.
First, what's a calamity? Well, it could be a chronic illness, a long period of unemployment, debts, a state of poverty, a family problem, inability to marry, etc, etc.
Now, what could be behind your calamity?
One reason may be ibtila (test or trial).
"Do men imagine that they will be left (at ease) because they say, We believe, and will not be tested with affliction? Lo! We tested those who were before you. Thus Allah knoweth those who are sincere, and knoweth those who feign." (Al-Ankabut : 2-3)
If you are "sincere", as the Koran put it, then the problem is half solved once you say words that prove your sincerity.
"And surely We shall try you with something of fear and hunger, and loss of wealth and lives and crops; but give glad tidings to the steadfast, Who say, when a misfortune striketh them: Lo! we are Allah's and Lo! unto Him we are returning. Such are they on whom are blessings from their Lord, and mercy. Such are the rightly guided." (Al-Baqara : 155-157)
As you see, if you say those words there will be blessings and mercy on you from your Lord. But is that enough? No. That's just the first step. The next step is du'a (invocations).
By making invocations to God you are in fact proving your submission to Him. You realize that you are but a slave of God and that without God's grace you just can't really get what you want.
"O mankind! Ye are the poor in your relation to Allah. And Allah! He is the Absolute, the Owner of Praise." (Fatir : 15)
Some people say they would rather love God than submit to Him. God says:
"there is naught else in their breasts save pride which they will never attain." (Ghafir : 56)
What should you say in your du'a? Well, nobody knows better than you what you feel. So express your feelings in simple words. Ask of God what you expect Him to do for you. But before "asking" anything, do praise God. Glorify Him. Apologize to Him. Show that you "care" about God so that He will care about you in a way that you can feel it. God cares about you already -as long as you believe in Him- but now you'll feel God's care through things that happen in your life. God says to you : "Pray unto me and I will hear your prayer." So pray unto God and you will see that God did hear your prayer.
"And your Lord hath said: Pray unto me and I will hear your prayer. Lo! those who scorn My service, they will enter hell, disgraced." (Ghafir : 60)
"And when My servants question thee concerning Me, then surely I am nigh. I answer the prayer of the suppliant when he crieth unto Me. So let them bear My call and let them trust in Me, in order that they may be led aright." (Al-Baqara : 186)
Anyway, whatever you do, you won't really get what you want unless you are humble to God.
"We have sent already unto peoples that were before thee, and We visited them with tribulation and adversity, in order that they might grow humble. If only, when our disaster came on them, they had been humble! But their hearts were hardened and the devil made all that they used to do seem fair unto them! Then, when they forgot that whereof they had been reminded, We opened unto them the gates of all things till, even as they were rejoicing in that which they were given, We seized them unawares, and lo! they were dumbfounded." (Al-An'am : 42-44)
Why should you be humble? Well, when you do someone a favour wouldn't you expect some kind of thanks in return? Would you be pleased if that person you were kind to was an ingrate towards you? So would it be fair to pray unto God and when your prayer was answered you forgot all about God and what He did for you?
"And if misfortune touch a man he crieth unto Us, (while reclining) on his side, or sitting or standing, but when We have relieved him of the misfortune he goeth his way as though he had not cried unto Us because of a misfortune that afflicted him. Thus is what they do made (seeming) fair unto the prodigal." (Yunus : 12)
Now that I have made invocations to God, you wonder, when will my prayers be answered?
Nobody can tell you, to be honest. So if your ordeal lasts longer than you expected or hoped, then a question may nag you: isn't it true that anyone who has in his heart good faith equal to the weight of a wheat grain or a barley seed will enter Paradise? Since these people around me who share my belief will all enter Paradise, so why should they be "happier" than I--who am much more scrupulous about practising my faith than many of them? Why should I be deprived of the joys they are having now since we will all have quite the same joys in the Hereafter?
Well, it's not "quite the same joys",I'm afraid.
"See how We prefer one above another, and verily the Hereafter will be greater in degrees and greater in preferment." (Al-Isra : 21)
" And ye will be three kinds: (First) those on the right hand; what of those on the right hand? And (then) those on the left hand; what of those on the left hand? And the foremost in the race , the foremost in the race: Those are they who will be brought nigh, In gardens of delight; A multitude of those of old, And a few of those of later time, On lined couches, Reclining therein face to face. There wait on them immortal youths, With bowls and ewers and a cup from a pure spring, Wherefrom they get no aching of the head nor any madness, And fruit that they prefer, And flesh of fowls that they desire, And (there are) fair ones with wide, lovely eyes, Like unto hidden pearls, Reward for what they used to do. There hear they no vain speaking nor recrimination, (Naught) but the saying: Peace, (and again) Peace. And those on the right hand; what of those on the right hand? Among thornless lote tree, And clustered plantains, And spreading shade, And water gushing, And fruit in plenary, Neither out of reach nor yet forbidden, And raised couches, Lo! We have created them a (new) creation, And made them virgins, Lovers, friends, For those on the right hand; A multitude of those of old, And a multitude of those of later time." (Al-Waqi'a : 7-40)
You may even be reunited with your family there:
"And they who believe and whose seed follow them in faith, We cause their seed to join them (there), and We deprive them of naught of their (life's) work. Every man is a pledge for that which he hath earned." (At-Tur : 21)
Even in this life of the world your life is not quite the same as that of those you may be envious of:
"For those who do good in this world there is a good (reward) and the home of the Hereafter will be better. Pleasant indeed will be the home of those who ward off (evil)." (An-Nahl : 30)
"Or do those who commit ill deeds suppose that We shall make them as those who believe and do good works, the same life and death? Bad is their judgment!" (Al-Jathiya : 21)
"Whosoever doeth right, whether male or female, and is a believer, him verily We shall quicken with good life, and We shall pay them a recompense in proportion to the best of what they used to do." (An-Nahl : 97)
Maybe -because of your distress- you don't perceive this "good life": you don't look beyond appearances.
It would be great if you had a steady job, a partner that you love, a house of your own and children at an early age. But life is not only a steady job; it's not only a good partner; it's not only a house of one's own; it's not only begetting children at an early age. Life is, above all, a feeling. Will you be happy with your job? Will you be happy with your partner? Will you feel at home in your house? Will your children be as successful as you?
The life of the world is just like a movie or play: actors play different roles, and each actor is judged on his/her own performance. A wretched beggar in a movie is not necessarily a wretched actor in real life. At the end of a play, all actors line up in a straight row and bow to the spectators, but some actors get more applause than others, depending on their talent. We shall all bow to God one day and we will be judged on our "performances" as believers, and only there shall we live the real Life--if we are good believers.
Innocent Whispers
Ibtila tarqiya (or Promotion Test) is for the devout faithful who -at worst- commit minor sins or no sins at all. God tries these people with affliction and adversity so that their iman and yaqeen will rise higher and higher. Their patience and endurance (despite all hardships) will earn them higher grades in Paradise than they would normally get for merely performing acts of worship (like praying, fasting, etc.).
Ibtila tanqiya (or Cleansing Test) is for sinners among believers. The calamities that befall these people are a means to cleanse them of their sins if they stick to their iman and do good deeds to atone for their ill deeds. Ibtila in this sense is kind of educative punishment.
"He who doeth wrong will have the recompense thereof, and will not find against Allah any protecting friend or helper." (An-Nisaa : 123)
"Whatever of misfortune striketh you, it is what your right hands have earned. And He forgiveth much" (Ash-Shura : 30)
As you see, God forgives much, because the punishment is not meant to make you suffer, but rather to lead you (back) onto the right path.
"See they not that they are tested once or twice in every year? Still they turn not in repentance, neither pay they heed." (At-Tauba : 126)
God warns you and guides you at the same time:
"Allah biddeth you beware (only) of Himself. Unto Allah is the journeying." (Al-i'Imran : 28)
"And let those who conspire to evade orders beware lest grief or painful punishment befall them." (An-Nur : 63)
"Allah would explain to you and guide you by the examples of those who were before you, and would turn to you in mercy. Allah is Knower, Wise. And Allah would turn to you in mercy; but those who follow vain desires would have you go tremendously astray. Allah would make the burden light for you, for man was created weak." (An-Nisaa : 26-28)
"If ye avoid the great (things) which ye are forbidden, We will remit from you your evil deeds and make you enter at a noble gate." (An-Nisaa : 31)
"And let those who cannot find a match keep chaste till Allah give them independence by His grace." (An-Nur : 33)
"But lo! with hardship goeth ease, Lo! with hardship goeth ease" (Al-Sharh : 5-6)
Strangely enough, there's a kind of ibtila which could be for both the devout and sinners alike. This ibtila is kind of a preparation for a mission that you'll have to accomplish later in your life. This is the longest and hardest ibtila. This could be, though, a godsend for sinners if they managed to endure their hardships until the "mission" was accomplished, for the prize is no less than the company of the Elite in Paradise.
"Whoso obeyeth Allah and the messenger, they are with those unto whom Allah hath shown favor, of the Prophets and the saints and the martyrs and the righteous. The best of company are they! Such is the bounty of Allah, and Allah sufficeth as knower." (An-Nisaa : 69-70)
Of course, that's not easy. All kinds of hardship are hard to bear--be you a believer or disbeliever. But what's the alternative? Sin?
"Or do those who do ill deeds imagine that they can outstrip Us: Evil (for them) is that which they decide." (Al-Ankabut : 4)
"And thy Lord is not unaware of what ye (mortals) do." (An-Naml : 93)
"Lo! thy Lord is ever." (Al-Fajr : 14)
"O mankind! Your rebellion is only against yourselves. (Ye have) enjoyment of the life of the world; then unto Us is your return and We shall proclaim unto you what ye used to do. The similitude of the life of the world is only as water which We send down from the sky, then the earth's growth of that which men and cattle eat mingleth with it till, when the earth hath taken on her ornaments and is embellished, and her people deem that they are masters of her, Our commandment cometh by night or by day and we make it as reaped corn as if it had not flourished yesterday. Thus do We expound the revelations for people who reflect. And Allah summoneth to the abode of peace, and leadeth whom He will to a straight path." (Yunus : 23-25)
There are, therefore, only two options open to you: either you choose to be with God or follow false deities. If you choose to be with God, God will be with you.
"Allah is the Protecting Friend of those who believe. He bringeth them out of darkness into light. As for those who disbelieve, their patrons are false deities. They bring them out of light into darkness. Such are rightful owners of the Fire. They will abide therein." (Al-Baqara : 257)
But what about those folks out there who sin day and night and yet don't suffer like me, you ask? How about those who don't believe in the first place?
First, if you ask this question, then, definitely, there's something wrong with your iman. You have to ask yourself: are you a true believer? Here are the criteria to judge yourself, to gauge the level your iman:
"They only are the (true) believers whose hearts feel fear when Allah is mentioned, and when the revelations of Allah are recited unto them they increase their faith, and who trust in their Lord; Who establish worship and spend of that We have bestowed on them. Those are they who are in truth believers. For them are grades (of honor) with their Lord, and pardon, and a bountiful provision." (Al-Anfal : 3-4)
The true believers are those "Who have believed and whose hearts have rest in the remembrance of Allah. Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest! Those who believe and do right: Joy is for them, and bliss (their) journey's end." (Ar-Ra'd : 28-29)
"They make it favor unto thee (Muhammad) that they have surrendered (unto Him). Say: Deem not your Surrender a favor unto me; nay, but Allah doth confer a favor on you, inasmuch as He hath led you to the Faith, if ye are earnest." (Al-Hujurat : 17)
"Say: O mankind! Now hath the Truth from your Lord come unto you. So whosoever is guided, is guided only for (the good of) his soul, and whosoever erreth erreth only against it. And I am not a warder over you." (Yunus : 108)
"Proofs have come unto you from your Lord, so whoso seeth it is for his own good, and whoso is blind is blind to his own hurt. And I am not a keeper over you." (Al-An'am : 104)
Then, ask yourself: what do you want?
Do you want to be happy in this world, in the Hereafter or in both? "But of mankind is he who saith: "Our Lord! Give unto us in the world," and he hath no portion in the Hereafter." (Al-Baqara : 200)
"Whoso desireth that (life) which hasteneth away, We hasten for him therein that We will for whom We please. And afterward We have appointed for him hell; he will endure the heat thereof, condemned, rejected. And whoso desireth the Hereafter and striveth for it with the effort necessary, being a believer; for such, their effort findeth favor (with their Lord). Each do We supply, both these and those, from the bounty of thy Lord. And the bounty of thy Lord can never be walled up." (Al-Isra : 18-20)
"Whoso desireth the reward of the world, (let him know that) with Allah is the reward of the world and the Hereafter. Allah is ever Hearer, Seer." (An-Nisaa : 134)
"Your Lord is best aware of what is in your minds. If ye are righteous, then lo! He was ever Forgiving unto those who turn (unto Him)." (Al-Isra : 25)
"And were it not that mankind would have become one community, We might well have appointed, for those who disbelieve in the Beneficent, roofs of silver for their houses and stairs (of silver) whereby to mount, And for their houses doors (of silver) and couches of silver whereon to recline, And ornaments of gold. Yet all that would have been but a provision of the life of the world. And the Hereafter with your Lord would have been for those who keep from evil." (Az-Zukhruf : 33-35)
"And those who deny Our revelations step by step We lead them on from whence they know not. I give them rein (for) lo! My scheme is strong." (Al-A'raf : 182-183)
"And let not those who disbelieve imagine that the rein We give them bodeth good unto their souls. We only give them rein that they may grow in sinfulness. And theirs will be a shameful doom." (Al-i'Imran : 178)
"Say: As for him who is in error, the Beneficent will verily prolong his span of life until, when they behold that which they were promised, whether it be punishment (in the world), or Hour (of Doom), they will know who is worse in position and who is weaker as an army. Allah increaseth in right guidance those who walk aright, and the good deeds which endure are better in thy Lord's sight for reward, and better for resort." (Maryam : 75-76)
"Leave Me (to deal) with him whom I created lonely, And then bestowed upon him ample means, And sons abiding in his presence, And made (life) smooth for him. Yet he desireth that I should give more. Nay! For lo! he hath been stubborn to Our revelations." (Al-Muddathir : 11-16)
"Shall We then treat those who have surrendered as We treat the guilty?" (Al-Qalam : 35)
"Is he who is a believer like unto him who is an evil liver? They are not alike." (As-Sajda : 18)
"Think they that in the wealth and sons wherewith We provide them We hasten unto them with good things? Nay, but they perceive not." (Al-Muminun : 55-56)
"See how We prefer one above another, and verily the Hereafter will be greater in degrees and greater in preferment." (Al-Isra : 21)
"Say: The evil and the good are not alike even though the plenty of the evil attract thee. So be mindful of your duty to Allah, O men of understanding, that ye may succeed." (Al-Maidah : 100)
"Allah enlargeth livelihood for whom He will, and straiteneth (it for whom He will); and they rejoice in the life of the world, whereas the life of the world is but brief comfort as compared with the Hereafter." (Ar-Ra'd : 26)
"Then withdraw (O Muhammad) from him who fleeth from Our remembrance and desireth but the life of the world. Such is their sum of knowledge. Lo! thy Lord is best aware of him who strayeth, and He is best aware of him who goeth right." (An-Najm : 29-30)
"Noah said: My Lord! they have disobeyed me and followed one whose wealth and children increase him in naught save ruin" (Nuh : 21)
"Lo! Allah will cause those who believe and do good works to enter Gardens underneath which rivers flow; while those who disbelieve take their comfort in this life and eat even as the cattle eat, and the Fire is their habitation." (Muhammad : 12)
"And on the day when those who disbelieve are exposed to the Fire (it will be said): Ye squandered your good things in the life of the world and sought comfort therein. Now this day ye are rewarded with the doom of ignominy because ye were disdainful in the land without a right and because ye used to transgress." (Al-Ahqaf : 20)
"and the mercy of thy Lord is better than (the wealth) that they amass." (Az-Zukhruf : 32)
"This life of the world is but a pastime and a game. Lo! the home of the Hereafter that is Life, if they but knew." (Al-Ankabut : 64)
"And We have appointed some of you a test for others: Will ye be steadfast? And thy Lord is ever Seer." (Al-Furqan : 20)
Besides, are we the one to tell God what to do with His creation?
"He will not be questioned as to that which He doeth, but they will be questioned." (Al-Anbiyaa : 23)
"Lo! thy Lord is Doer of what He will." (Hud : 107)
"Is it they who apportion their Lord's mercy? We have apportioned among them their livelihood in the life of the world, and raised some of them above others in rank that some of them may take labor from others; and the mercy of thy Lord is better than (the wealth) that they amass." (Az-Zukhruf : 32)
"Say: O Allah! Owner of Sovereignty! Thou givest sovereignty unto whom Thou wilt, and Thou withdrawest sovereignty from whom Thou wilt. Thou exaltest whom Thou wilt and Thou abasest whom Thou wilt. In Thy hand is the good. Lo! Thou art Able to do all things." (Al-i'Imran : 26)
"He it is who hath placed you as viceroys of the earth and hath exalted some of you in rank above others, that He may try you by (the test of) that which He hath given you. Lo! Thy Lord is swift in prosecution, and lo! He is Forgiving, Merciful." (Al-An'am : 165)
"And Allah hath favored some of you above others in provision." (An-Nahl : 71)
"Allah maketh the provision wide for whom He will of His bondmen, and straiteneth it for whom (He will). Lo! Allah is Aware of all things." (Al-Ankabut : 62)
"Unto Allah belongeth the sovereignty of the heavens and the earth. He createth what He will. He bestoweth female (offspring) upon whom He will, and bestoweth male (offspring) upon whom He will; Or He mingleth them, males and females, and He maketh barren whom He will. Lo! He is Knower, Powerful." (Ash-Shura : 49-50)
"Allah (Himself) is witness that there is no God save Him. And the angels and the men of learning (too are witness). Maintaining His creation in justice, there is no God save Him, the Almighty, the Wise." (Al-i'Imran : 18)
"and of knowledge ye have been vouchsafed but little." (Al-Isra : 85)
"Such is Allah, your Lord. There is no God save Him, the Creator of all things, so worship Him. And He taketh care of all things. Vision comprehendeth Him not, but He comprehendeth (all) vision . He is the Subtile, the Aware." (Al-An'am : 102-103)
"Lo! thy Lord is Wise, Aware." (Al-An'am : 83)
"So coin not similitudes for Allah. Lo! Allah knoweth; ye know not." (An-Nahl : 74)
"And if the Truth had followed their desires, verily the heavens and the earth and whosoever is therein had been corrupted. Nay, We have brought them their Reminder, but from their Reminder they now turn away." (Al-Muminun : 71)
"Praise be to Allah, unto Whom belongeth whatsoever is in the heavens and whatsoever is in the earth. His is the praise in the Hereafter, and He is the Wise, the Aware. He knoweth that which goeth down into the earth and that which cometh forth from it, and that which descendeth from the heaven and that which ascendeth into it. He is the Merciful, the Forgiving." (Saba : 1-2)
"Lo! the righteous verily are in delight, On couches, gazing, thou wilt know in their faces the radiance of delight, They are given to drink of a pure wine, sealed, Whose seal is musk. For this let (all) those strive who strive for bliss, And mixed with water of Tasnim, A spring whence those brought near to Allah drink. Lo! the guilty used to laugh at those who believed, And wink one to another when they passed them; And when they returned to their own folk, they returned jetting; And when they saw them they said: Lo! these have gone astray. Yet they were not sent as guardians over them. This day it is those who believe who have the laugh of disbelievers, On high couches, gazing. Are not the disbelievers paid for what they used to do?" (Al-Mutaffifoon :22-36)
"That which ye have wasteth away, and that which Allah hath remaineth. And verily We shall pay those who are steadfast a recompense in proportion to the best of what they used to do." (An-Nahl : 96)
"And unto Allah belongeth whatsoever is in the heavens and whatsoever is in the earth, that He may reward those who do evil with that which they have done, and reward those who do good with goodness. Those who avoid enormities of sin and abominations, save the unwilled offences (for them) lo! thy Lord is of vast mercy. He is best aware of you (from the time) when He created you from the earth, and when ye were hidden in the bellies of your mothers. Therefor ascribe not purity unto yourselves. He is best aware of him who wardeth off (evil)." (An-Najm : 31-32)
"And Allah brought you forth from the wombs of your mothers knowing nothing, and gave you hearing and sight and hearts that haply ye might give thanks." (An-Nahl : 78)
"And whatever of comfort ye enjoy, it is from Allah. Then, when misfortune reacheth you, unto Him ye cry for help. And afterward, when He hath rid you of the misfortune, behold! a set of you attribute partners to their Lord, So as to deny that which We have given them. Then enjoy life (while ye may), for ye will come to know." (An-Nahl : 53-55)
"Whatever of good befalleth thee (O man) it is from Allah, and whatever of ill befalleth thee it is from thyself." (An-Nisaa : 79)
"That is because Allah never changeth the grace He hath bestowed on any people until they first change that which is in their hearts, and (that is) because Allah is Hearer, Knower." (Al-Anfal : 53)
So instead of spending your time thinking about why so-and-so is so happy although he/she is the arch-sinner of the neighbourhood, do as God tells you:
"And covet not the thing in which Allah hath made some of you excel others. Unto men a fortune from that which they have earned, and unto women a fortune from that which they have earned. (Envy not one another) but ask Allah of His bounty. Lo! Allah is ever Knower of all things." (An-Nisaa : 32)
"Your Lord is best aware of what is in your minds. If ye are righteous, then lo! He was ever Forgiving unto those who turn (unto Him)." (Al-Isra : 25)
"If Allah knoweth any good in your hearts He will give you better than that which hath been taken from you, and will forgive you. Lo! Allah is Forgiving, Merciful." (Al-Anfal : 70)
And here is where begins the solution to your problem.
Innocent Whispers
"And whosoever keepeth his duty to Allah, Allah will appoint a way out for him, And will provide for him from (a quarter) whence he hath no expectation. And whosoever putteth his trust in Allah, He will suffice him. Lo! Allah bringeth His command to pass. Allah hath set a measure for all things." (At-Talaq : 2-3)
"And whosoever keepeth his duty to Allah, He maketh his course easy for him. That is the commandment of Allah which He revealeth unto you. And whoso keepeth his duty to Allah, He will remit from him his evil deeds and magnify reward for him." (At-Talaq : 4-5)
"Lo! he who wardeth off (evil) and endureth (findeth favor); for verily Allah loseth not the wages of the kindly." (Yusuf : 90)
Taqwa may be easy for some, but it may be extremely hard for others. So it may take some time before someone can really meet this condition. God says:
"And turn unto Allah together, O believers, in order that ye may succeed." (An-Nur : 31)
"O ye who believe! Turn unto Allah in sincere repentance! It may be that your Lord will remit from you your evil deeds and bring you into Gardens underneath which rivers flow, on the day when Allah will not abase the Prophet and those who believe with him. Their light will run before them and on their right hands: they will say: Our Lord! Perfect our light for us, and forgive us! Lo! Thou art Able to do all things." (At-Tahrim : 8)
"Forsake the outwardness of sin and the inwardness thereof. Lo! those who garner sin will be awarded that which they have earned." (Al-An'am : 120)
"He knoweth the traitor of the eyes, and that which the bosoms hide." (Ghafir : 19)
"Lo! Allah changeth not the condition of a folk until they (first) change that which is in their hearts; and if Allah willeth misfortune for a folk there is none that can repel it, nor have they a defender beside Him." (Ar-Ra'd : 11)
"The Forgiver of sin, the Acceptor of repentance, the Stern in punishment, the Bountiful. There is no God save Him. Unto Him is the journeying." (Ghafir : 3)
But God does help those who are really sincere about going His way:
"As for those who strive in Us, We surely guide them to Our paths, and lo! Allah is with the good." (Al-Ankabut : 69)
"Allah increaseth in right guidance those who walk aright, and the good deeds which endure are better in thy Lord's sight for reward, and better for resort." (Maryam : 76)
"While as for those who walk aright, He addeth to their guidance, and giveth them their protection (against evil)." (Muhammad : 17)
Being a muttaqi (one who wards off evil) doesn't mean, though, that you will never sin:
"And obey Allah and the messenger, that ye may find mercy. And vie one with another for forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Paradise as wide as are the heavens and the earth, prepared for those who ward off (evil); Those who spend (of that which Allah hath given them) in ease and in adversity, those who control their wrath and are forgiving toward mankind; Allah loveth the good; And those who, when they do an evil thing or wrong themselves, remember Allah and implore forgiveness for their sins -Who forgiveth sins save Allah only?- and will not knowingly repeat (the wrong) they did. The reward of such will be forgiveness from their Lord, and Gardens underneath which rivers flow, wherein they will abide for ever, a bountiful reward for workers!" (Al-i'Imran : 132-136)
But even with du'a and taqwa, you have to be patient, because even if your wish does not seem to be fulfilled quickly enough, this doesn't mean that God does not take into account the efforts you've been making to please Him. Even if you may get the impression that God does not care about your "misery", He is in fact with you.
"Lo! Allah is with the steadfast." (Al-Baqara : 153)
Moreover, "Allah loveth the steadfast." (Al-i'Imran : 146)
"But if ye endure patiently, verily it is better for the patient." (An-Nahl : 126)
"Endure thou patiently (O Muhammad). Thine endurance is only by (the help of) Allah." (An-Nahl : 127)
"And have patience, (O Muhammad), for lo! Allah loseth not the wages of the good." (Hud : 115)
"Lo! as for those who believe and do good works, Lo! We suffer not the reward of one whose work is goodly to be lost." (Al-Kahf : 30)
"But it was not Allah's purpose that your faith should be in vain, for Allah is full of pity, Merciful toward mankind." (Al-Baqara : 143)
"All that are in the heavens and the earth entreat Him. Every day He exerciseth (universal) power." (Ar-Rahman : 29)
"And let not thy hand be chained to thy neck nor open it with a complete opening, lest thou sit down rebuked, denuded. Lo! thy Lord enlargeth the provision for whom He will, and straiteneth (it for whom He will). Lo, He was ever Knower, Seer of His slaves." (Al-Isra : 29-30)
If you think you're steadfast already, then think again!
"And of His portents are the ships, like banners on the sea; If He will He calmeth the wind so that they keep still upon its surface. Lo! herein verily are signs for every steadfast grateful (heart)." (Ash-Shura : 32-33)
"O ye who believe! Endure, outdo all others in endurance, be ready, and observe your duty to Allah, in order that ye may succeed." (Al-i'Imran : 200)
See? You have to "outdo all others in endurance"! You know why? Well, ....
"And of mankind is he who would sell himself, seeking the pleasure of Allah; and Allah hath compassion on (His) bondmen." (Al-Baqara : 207)
"O ye who believe! Seek help in steadfastness, and prayer. Lo! Allah is with the steadfast." (Al-Baqara : 153)
There are two kinds of patience: 1) positive patience, which means working hard in order to attain one's aim and enduring hardship; 2) negative patience, that is, waiting with crossed arms and lamenting one's lot.
As a believer, you have to have both ambition and patience, because they will allow you to have a better vision of things.
"But if ye persevere and ward off (evil), then that is of the steadfast heart of things." (Al-i'Imran : 186)
"And verily whoso is patient and forgiveth, lo! that, verily, is (of) the steadfast heart of things." (Ash-Shura : 43)
"Then have patience (O Muhammad) even as the stout of heart among the messengers (of old) had patience" (Al-Ahqaf : 35)
If Man was placed as a viceroy in the earth, how about you who aren't only a man, but on top of that a believer?
"And when thy Lord said unto the angels: Lo! I am about to place a viceroy in the earth" (Al-Baqara : 30)
"Recite unto them the tale of him to whom We gave Our revelations, but he sloughed them off, so Satan overtook him and he became of those who lead astray. And had We willed We could have raised him by their means, but he clung to the earth and followed his own lust. Therefor his likeness is as the likeness of a dog; if thou attackest him he panteth with his tongue out, and if thou leavest him he panteth with his tongue out. Such is the likeness of the people who deny Our revelations. Narrate unto them the history (of the men of old), that haply they may take thought." (Al-A'raf : 175-176)
Lastly, if you really are a patient person, then consider yourself lucky, for patience is the greatest thing man can ever be given.
"But none is granted it save those who are steadfast, and none is granted it save the owner of great happiness." (Fussilat : 35)
"For those who do good in this world there is good, and Allah's earth is spacious. Verily the steadfast will be paid their wages without stint." (Az-Zumar : 10)
And patience is -in God's sight- a great virtue, too.
"Lo! We found him steadfast, how excellent a slave! Lo! he was ever turning in repentance (to his Lord)." (Sad :44)
Innocent Whispers
Any believer going through such hardship could ask that question if he said "Lo! we are Allah's and Lo! unto Him we are returning", and made invokations to God, and strove as best he could to ward off evil, and outdid all others in endurance, and yet his hardship went on and on as before, if not worse. The fact is that all the above efforts are good, but they may not be sufficient because God does not always answer prayers as quickly as one makes them, except for the case of "the wronged one". "Is not He (best) who answereth the wronged one when he crieth unto Him and removeth the evil" (An-Naml : 62). Then bear in mind that if God did not answer your prayers as soon as you made them, it might be because what you want(ed) was/is not good for you. Time will tell you that the person who was the sunshine of your life at some point, or the job that looked like your dream job, wasn't really good for you. "but it may happen that ye hate a thing which is good for you, and it may happen that ye love a thing which is bad for you. Allah knoweth, ye know not." (Al-Baqara : 216)
"Naught of disaster befalleth in the earth or in yourselves but it is in a Book before We bring it into being Lo! that is easy for Allah, That ye grieve not for the sake of that which hath escaped you, nor yet exult because of that which hath been given." (Al-Hadeed : 22-23)
Another fact is that a believer can have quite the same problems as a disbeliever. A believer, too, can fall ill.
"And if ye are sick or on a journey, or one of you cometh from the closet, or ye have had contact with women and ye find not water , then go to clean on high ground and rub your faces and your hands with some of it." (Al-Maidah : 6)
"And whoever among you is sick or hath an ailment of the head must pay a ransom of fasting or alms giving or offering." (Al-Baqara : 196)
"And when I sicken , then He healeth me" (Ash-Shu'araa : 80)
A believer, too, can be poor.
"Let him who hath abundance spend of his abundance, and he whose provision is measured, let him spend of that which Allah hath given him. Allah asketh naught of any soul save that which He hath given it. Allah will vouchsafe, after hardship, ease." (At-Talaq : 7)
"Whoso (of the guardians) is rich, let him abstain generously (from taking of the property of orphans); and whoso is poor let him take thereof in reason (for his guardianship)."(An-Nisaa : 6)
"And marry such of you as are solitary and the pious of your slaves and maid servants. If they be poor; Allah will enrich them of His bounty . Allah is of ample means, Aware." (An-Nur : 32)
A believer, too, can undergo financial difficulties.
"And if the debtor is in straitened circumstances, then (let there be) postponement to (the time of) ease; and that ye remit the debt as alms giving would be better for you if ye did but know." (Al-Baqara : 280)
A believer, too, can have a family problem.
"If a woman feareth ill treatment from her husband, or desertion, it is no sin for them twain if they make terms of peace between themselves. Peace is better. But greed hath been made present in the minds (of men). If ye do good and keep from evil, Lo! Allah is ever Informed of what ye do. Ye will not be able to deal equally between (your) wives, however much ye wish (to do so): But turn not altogether away (from one), leaving her as in suspense. If ye do good and keep from evil, lo! Allah is ever Forgiving, Merciful. But if they separate, Allah will compensate each out of His abundance. Allah is ever All Embracing, All Knowing." (An-Nisaa : 128-130)
A believer, too, can have difficulty getting married.
"And let those who cannot find a match keep chaste till Allah give them independence by His grace." (An-Nur : 33)
A believer can suffer a lot of things.
"And surely We shall try you with something of fear and hunger, and loss of wealth and lives and crops" (Al-Baqara : 155)
A believer, too, can lose hope.
"And when We cause mankind to taste of mercy they rejoice therein; but if an evil thing befall them as the consequence of their own deeds, lo! they are in despair! See they not that Allah enlargeth the provision for whom He will, and straiteneth (it for whom He will). Lo! herein indeed are portents for folk who believe." (Ar-Rum : 36-37)
So what's the difference between a believer and a disbeliever in this respect? God says:
"If ye are suffering, lo! they suffer even as ye suffer and ye hope from Allah that for which they cannot hope. Allah is ever Knower, Wise." (An-Nisaa : 104)
It's a fact that (some) disbelievers do suffer as (some) believers do, but while a believer is supposed to link the life of the world to the Hereafter, a disbeliever seeks comfort in this world only--without relying on any deity whatsoever, following his own lust and desires, assuming that his success in this life would depend only on his own physical and mental capabilities. While a believer seeks success in both this life and the Hereafter, a disbeliever concentrates all his intellectual efforts and energy on the life of the world, believing that this is the wisest way to deal with one's life. While a disbeliever does not follow any Holy Book, save his own desires, a believer is constantly reminded that there's another life awaiting him and that he should prepare for it.
Disbelievers say: "Doth he promise you that you, when ye are dead and have become dust and bones, will (again) be brought forth? Begone, begone, with that which ye are promised! There is naught but our life of the world; we die and we live, and we shall not be raised (again)." (Al-Muminun : 35-37)
God says: "O ye who believe! Observe your duty to Allah. And let every soul look to that which it sendeth on before for the morrow. And observe your duty to Allah! Lo! Allah is informed of what ye do." (Al-Hashr : 18)
Our problem is that we -today's Muslims- tend not to recognize these facts, because we have been brought up within a system that dinned into us that "if you work hard, you will succeed". We tend to ignore lessons from the past.
Why don't we remember, for instance, that before this faith -Islam- became so powerful, so widespread, when it was still a naissant faith in the midst of a harsh environment, the first believers who embraced it had suffered so much; they were subjected to torture, blockades, starvation, humiliation, but they resisted and remained stoic, and carried the faith in their hearts and on their shoulders until it became the Faith of great empires that stretched east and westward and has now become the fastest-growing religion in the greatest country on earth, America? Those early believers, too, asked the same questions you asked when they felt too weak to bear any more hardship, and here's the reply they got:
"Or think ye that ye will enter Paradise while yet there hath not come unto you the like of (that which came to) those who passed away before you? Affliction and adversity befell them, they were shaken as with earthquake, till the messenger (of Allah) and those who believed along with him said: When cometh Allah's help? Now surely Allah's help is nigh." (Al-Baqara : 214)
If you had a smooth life -full of joy and bliss, with no sufferings, no worries- you wouldn't probably ask yourself such existentialist questions. But now that you've asked them, you have got closer to meditating about your very existence. You would think of how you came into being out of nothing, of how God -by giving you life- gave you a chance to live in perfect happiness in Paradise--if only you were patient until the ordeal was over! So if you really want to be one of those who will lead an eternal, happy life in Paradise, you have to bear the sufferings that have been afflicted on you in this world (and which will be over, anyway). Paradise has a price, and if you want to go to Paradise you have to pay that price, and the price is patience.
"And We have appointed some of you a test for others: Will ye be steadfast? And thy Lord is ever Seer." (Al-Furqan : 20)
"O mankind! Lo! the promise of Allah is true. So let not the life of the world beguile you, and let not the (avowed) beguiler beguile you with regard to Allah." (Fatir : 5)
"The devil promiseth you destitution and enjoineth on you lewdness. But Allah promiseth you forgiveness from Himself with bounty. Allah is All Embracing, All Knowing." (Al-Baqara : 268)
Innocent Whispers
Patience is a big word. Patience is a frightening word. Patience is the last thing one would wish to hear about. A Moroccan proverb goes, “Patience is the only door where people don’t jostle.” Even if you earnestly believe that patience is key to success; even if you preach patience in mosques, in speeches or in writing, it is always difficult to perceive patience as a “normal” thing. There will always come some time when you start questioning what you believe or preach if the thing you have been patient for seems still too far away. There are so many factors that may make patience hateful to many of us: society, age, chronic illness, family, etc, etc. So what to do when you have to live with patience on a daily basis –as if it were indeed a chronic illness? How do you manage your life as a patient (or patience-loving) person? How can you keep hope when everything around you inspires only despair and frustration?
Well, there is not one and only one answer to those questions. But as with big problems, one has to adopt certain strategies, which I will try to detail below:
1) If you don’t have a good Muslim friend already, then by all means look for one. Neither the Holy Koran, nor any wisdom in the world would replace a good (human) Muslim friend. I say ‘friend’, not a lover or someone to flirt with, and I say ‘human’ (that you can meet and speak to), not a pen-pal or a ‘friend’ on Facebook or the like. Such a friend –if you had one– would help you a great deal: by listening to you, by visiting or calling you (when you feel nobody cares about you), by giving you advice, by giving you the opportunity to say aloud what you think (about faith, for example) in secret. Even if you were an Imam or a great scholar, such a friend would still be a must if you were caught in a particularly harsh adversity.
Some would raise their eyebrows at the mentioning of “an Imam or a great scholar”
in this regard. Well, I know several stories, of which I’ll tell you one –knowing that some would say these are isolated cases. I once was envious of someone who won prizes for writing in the
then famous Muslim weekly Al-Muslimoon. He wrote wonderful things about Islam (even as a student of Islamic Studies at the Faculty (or College)). He then became an Islamic Studies Professor at
another Faculty, which is an enviable job here, which enabled him to marry soon after graduation. But then, one day, he picked a quarrel with his (uneducated) wife, and as he slapped her she
rushed into the kitchen and picked up a knife which she pointed threateningly at his chest. She did not kill him, fortunately. But that led to divorce after they had gotten two
children. You can imagine the life of this man after that incident.
2) Avoid unnecessary problems. For example, if you know that you are jobless or have a very low income and yet you take on debts beyond your means, then why blame others for your (resulting) ordeal? If, on the contrary, you have a certain amount of money (or any savings) but you are jobless and yet you keep spending as if you were going to find a new job the next month, then why blame others if you ran out of money and became a debtor? God says:
"And let not thy hand be chained to thy neck nor open it with a complete opening, lest thou sit down rebuked, denuded." (Al-Isra : 29)
"Spend your wealth for the cause of Allah, and be not cast by your own hands to ruin; and do good. Lo! Allah loveth the beneficent" (Al-Baqara : 195)
3) Be modest. If, for one reason or another, you found yourself up to the ears in debt, then don’t expect money to fall upon you from the skies. Do seek help from humans (while
waiting for God’s mercy). God does not prohibit you from asking help from humans. In fact, you won’t get such help (from humans) unless God so decides. If someone does help you, that is indeed a
mercy from Allah, Who says:
"but help ye one another unto righteousness and
pious duty. Help not one another unto sin and transgression, but keep your duty to Allah." (Al-Maidah : 2)
"And if the debtor is in straitened circumstances, then (let there be) postponement to (the time of) ease; and that ye remit the debt as alms giving would be
better for you if ye did but know." (Al-Baqara : 280)
"If Allah touch thee with affliction, there is none that can relieve therefrom save Him, and if He touch thee with good fortune (there is none that can
impair it); for He is Able to do all things. He is the Omnipotent over His slaves, and He is the Wise, the Knower." (Al-An'am : 17-18)
God is aware that some people are shy or feel that their dignity would be
hurt if they "begged" and therefore cannot ask help from other people.
"(Alms are) for the poor who are straitened for the cause of Allah, who cannot travel in the land (for trade). The
unthinking man accounteth them wealthy because of their restraint. Thou shalt know them by their mark: They do not beg of men with
importunity. And whatsoever good thing ye spend, lo! Allah knoweth it." (Al-Baqara : 273)
But if you really need help, then don’t hesitate to seek help and assistance from your fellow humans.
"Allah asketh naught of any soul save that which He hath given it. Allah will
vouchsafe, after hardship, ease." (At-Talaq : 7)
"No blame is there upon the blind nor any blame upon the lame nor any blame upon the sick
nor on yourselves if ye eat from your houses, or the houses of your fathers, or the houses of your mothers, or the houses of your brothers, or the houses of your sisters, or the houses of your
fathers' brothers, or the houses of your fathers' sisters, or the houses of your mothers' brothers, or the houses of your mothers' sisters, or (from that) whereof ye hold the keys, or (from the
house) of a friend. No sin shall it be for you whether ye eat together or apart. But when ye enter houses, salute one another with a greeting from Allah, blessed and sweet. Thus Allah maketh
clear His revelations for you, that haply ye may understand." (An-Nur : 61)
I do not mean by asking help “begging”. What I mean is that you can ask somebody
for a reasonable loan or something like that to be returned when possible, or maybe you could express your need to a friend in a way that he/she may take the hint and therefore offer his/her help
willingly.
4) If you can, do avoid mean people (even if they happen to be members of your own family). If you don’t want to lose a sibling, then try to limit your contact with him/her to the strict minimum (if he/she is a mean person) until your hardship is over. You will certainly find other people willing to help you (for one reason or another). Don’t care of those reasons as long as they are not impermissible. You know, most people would not provide help for God’s sake.
5) Be realistic. Even if you are the most devout person on earth, you shouldn’t expect God to do everything for you. Miracles do happen, but they don’t happen in everybody’s life. God did so much to protect the first believers in Islam; He helped them in so many ways; (but to give us the example,…) He also taught them to look after themselves. He said to them, for example:
"And when thou (O Muhammad) art among them and arrangest (their) worship for them, let
only a party of them stand with thee (to worship) and let them take their arms. Then when they have performed their prostrations let them fall to the rear and let another party come that hath not
worshipped and let them worship with thee, and let them take their precaution and their arms. Those who disbelieve long for you to neglect your arms and your baggage that they may attack you once
for all. It is no sin for you to lay aside your arms, if rain impedeth you or ye are sick. But take your precaution" (An-Nisaa : 102)
If you live in a place that is prone to earthquakes or floods, or any other sort of disaster, then it would be unwise to expect God to save the place from an earthquake or flood because of your presence in there. Even in the Koran there’s a reference to such bad places and bad happenings.
"As for the good land, its vegetation cometh forth by permission of its
Lord; while as for that which is bad, only evil cometh forth (from it). Thus do We recount the tokens for people who give thanks." (Al-A'raf : 58)
"His likeness is as the likeness of a rock whereon is dust of
earth; a rainstorm smiteth it, leaving it smooth and bare." (Al-Baqara : 264)
"And the likeness of those who
spend their wealth in search of Allah's pleasure, and for the strengthening of their souls, is as the likeness of a garden on a height. The rainstorm smiteth it and it bringeth forth its fruit
twofold. And if the rainstorm smite it not, then the shower. Allah is Seer of what ye do. Would any of you like to have a garden of palm trees and vines, with rivers flowing underneath it, with
all kinds of fruit for him therein; and old age hath stricken him and he hath feeble off spring; and a fiery whirlwind striketh it and it is (all) consumed by fire. Thus Allah maketh plain His
revelations unto you, in order that ye may give thought." (Al-Baqara : 265-266)
"Have ye taken security from Him Who is in the heaven that He will not cause the earth to swallow you when lo! it is convulsed? Or have ye taken security
from Him Who is in the heaven that He will not let loose on you a hurricane? But ye shall know the manner of My warning." (Al-Mulk :
16-17)
Another thing: if you live in a place where there is so much evil, then don’t
expect God to save that place from a disaster because you personally or a few pious people like you live there.
"And guard yourselves against a chastisement which cannot fall exclusively on those of you who are wrong doers, and know that
Allah is severe in punishment." (Al-Anfal : 25)
Such bad happenings could take place even in the presence of a prophet:
"And when Moses asked for water for his people, We said: Smite with thy staff the rock. And there gushed out therefrom twelve springs (so that) each tribe
knew their drinking place. Eat and drink of that which Allah hath provided, and do not act corruptly, making mischief in the earth." (Al-Baqara : 60)
6) If you can, do read a lot. Don’t just read the Koran. You can read poetry and
fiction, as well. You can read a bit of philosophy. You can read biographies or any inspirational material. You can read all this and more in addition to the Koran. The more you know of the world
the more you understand your sufferings and the more you know how to deal with them. In so doing, you would acquire wisdom, which is in itself a great gift from Allah.
"He giveth wisdom unto whom He will, and he unto whom wisdom is given, he truly hath received abundant good. But none remember
except men of understanding." (Al-Baqara : 269)
7) If you can, try to change the décor of your everyday life. If you live in
town, why not have a stroll or ride on the outskirts and see how people out there go about their everyday life; and while you are there contemplate the landscape
around you. The more you do it the more you discover new things you had taken for granted. This little "tourism" is in fact part of a believer's practise of his/her
faith.
"Will they not regard the camels,
how they are created? And the heaven, how it is railed?
And the hills, how they are set up? And the earth, how it is spread?" (Al-Gashiya : 17-20)
"Have they not observed what is before them and what is behind them of the sky and the earth?" (Saba :
9)
"By the sun and his brightness, And
the moon when she followeth him, And the day when it revealeth him, And the night when it enshroudeth him, And the heaven and Him who built it, And the earth and Him who spread it,
(...) " (Ash-Shams : 1-6)
"Hast thou not seen how Allah hath sent down water from the sky and hath caused it to penetrate the earth as water springs, and afterward thereby produceth
crops of divers hues; and afterward they wither and thou seest them turn yellow; then He maketh them chaff. Lo! herein verily is a reminder for men of understanding." " (Az-Zumar
: 21)
"Have they not travelled in the land, and have they
hearts wherewith to feel and ears wherewith to hear? For indeed it is not the eyes that grow blind, but it is the hearts, which are within the bosoms, that grow blind." (Al-Hajj :
46)
"Such as remember Allah, standing, sitting, and reclining, and consider the creation of the heavens and the earth, (and say): Our Lord! Thou createdst not
this in vain. Glory be to Thee! Preserve us from the doom of Fire" (Al-i'Imran : 191)
8) Even if you think you are keeping your duty to God, don’t fail to implore
forgiveness. In fact, asking forgiveness is a prerequisite for ease (end of your ordeal).
"And I have said: Seek pardon of your Lord, Lo! He was ever Forgiving. He will let loose the sky for you in plenteous rain,
And will help you with wealth and sons, and will assign unto you Gardens and will assign unto you rivers." (Nuh : 10-12)
9) In addition to asking forgiveness, remember Allah all the time (at least in your heart).
"O ye who believe! Remember Allah with much remembrance. And glorify Him
early and late." (Al-Ahzab : 41-42)
"And when the prayer is ended, then disperse in the land and seek of Allah's bounty, and remember Allah much, that ye may be successful."
(Al-Jumu'a : 10)
"Who have believed and whose hearts have rest in the remembrance of Allah. Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest!" (Ar-Ra'd
: 28)
"Such as remember Allah, standing, sitting, and reclining, and consider the creation of the heavens and the earth, (and say):
Our Lord! Thou createdst not this in vain. Glory be to Thee! Preserve us from the doom of Fire" (Al-i'Imran : 191)
10) Do amuse yourself from time to time, take rest, relax whenever you feel tired, because, as the Prophet (pbuh) said, “if the hearts get tired they become blind." And God says:
"Allah tasketh not a soul beyond its scope. For it (is only) that which it hath earned,
and against it (only) that which it hath deserved. Our Lord! Condemn us not if we forget, or miss the mark! Our Lord! Lay not on us such a burden as Thou didst lay on those before us! Our Lord!
Impose not on us that which we have not the strength to bear! Pardon us, absolve us and have mercy on us, Thou, our Protector" (Al-Baqara : 286)
"Say: Who hath forbidden the adornment of Allah which He hath brought
forth for His bondmen, and the good things of His providing? Say: Such, on the Day of Resurrection, will be only for those who believed during the life of the world. Thus do We detail Our
revelations for people who have knowledge." (Al-A'raf : 32)
"And wherein is beauty for you, when ye bring them home, and when ye take them out to
pasture." (An-Nahl : 6)
"And horses and mules and asses (hath He created) that ye may ride them, and for ornament.
And He createth that which ye know not." (An-Nahl : 8)
"Have they not then observed the sky above them, how
We have constructed it and beautified it, and how there are no rifts therein? And the earth have We spread out, and have flung firm hills therein, and have caused of every lovely kind to grow
thereon" (Qaf : 6-7)
"and sendeth down for you water from the sky wherewith We cause to spring forth joyous orchards" (An-Naml
: 60)
11) Try to avoid (excited) people who are newly married or who have just found a job, or who have just been relieved of a hardship –especially if these people used to quote a lot of Koran and Haddith during their talk with others. Because of their excitement and complacency, these people could harm you a great deal––if you (naively) expected them to be “more thoughtful” as a result of their previous suffering.
12) Stop from time to time to meditate about your own life. If necessary, isolate
yourself in open spaces (park, woods, beach, etc), where you could speak loud to yourself: ask yourself questions like, “Hasn’t there
really been anything new happening in my life since the beginning of this ordeal?” ...or questions like:
"Did He not find thee an orphan and protect
(thee)? Did He not find thee wandering and direct (thee)? Did He not find thee destitute and enrich (thee)?" (Adh-Dhuha : 6-8)
Ask yourself: what was your reaction the last time you were relieved of a hardship?
"And if misfortune touch a man he crieth unto Us, (while reclining) on his side, or sitting or standing, but when We have
relieved him of the misfortune he goeth his way as though he had not cried unto Us because of a misfortune that afflicted him. Thus is what they do made (seeming) fair unto the
prodigal." (Yunus : 12)
As nobody will really feel what you personally feel, then nobody would speak to you in the way you would wish. Now that you are alone (far from eyes and ears) you could speak to yourself as some
do in front of a mirror in the dressing-room. This sounds crazy, but you would find it as a breathing exercise! It would relieve your soul of its “poisons” as exercise would rid your
body of its poisons. By asking yourself frank questions here you would end up admitting that, after all, there’s some kind of “progress” in your life despite the overall ordeal.
13) To fight monotony and despondency, do assign yourself a long-term goal,
mission or project––if you haven’t done it already. Do everything you can towards the fulfilment of this project and you’ll restore your feeling of self-importance when you realize that –at
least– there’s something new happening in your life and that you’re not wasting away your time and life in this world.
"And trust thou in the Living One Who dieth not" (Al-Furqan : 58)
"Allah it is Who appointed for you the earth for a dwelling place and the sky for a canopy, and fashioned you and perfected your shapes, and hath provided
you with good things. Such is Allah, your Lord. Then blessed be Allah, the Lord of the Worlds! He is the Living One. There is no God save Him. So pray unto Him, making religion pure for Him
(only). Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds!" (Ghafir : 64-65)
"And your Lord hath said: Pray unto me and I will hear your prayer. Lo! those who scorn My service, they will enter hell, disgraced." (Ghafir
: 60)
"Lo! We verily do help Our messengers, and those who believe, in the life of the world and on the day when
the witnesses arise" (Ghafir : 51)
And the Angels say to you: "We are your protecting friends in the life of the world and in the Hereafter. There ye will have (all) that your souls
desire, and there ye will have (all) for which ye pray." (Fussilat : 31)
"And thou (Muhammad) art not occupied with any business and thou recitest not a
lecture from this (Scripture), and ye (mankind) perform no act, but We are Witness of you when ye are engaged therein. And not an atom's weight in the earth or in the sky escapeth your Lord, nor
what is less than that or greater than that, but it is (written) in a clear Book. Lo! verily the friends of Allah are (those) on whom fear (cometh) not, nor do they grieve. Those who believe and
keep their duty (to Allah), Theirs are good tidings in the life of the world and in the Hereafter. There is no changing the Words of Allah that is the Supreme Triumph. And let not their speech
grieve thee (O Muhammad). Lo! power belongeth wholly to Allah. He is the Hearer, the Knower. Lo! is it not unto Allah that belongeth whosoever is in the heavens and whosoever is in the
earth?" (Yunus : 61-66)
14) Know your human nature and start looking at people as “human beings” rather than “persons”. Try to pay attention to what people have in common: greed, arrogance, impatience, envy, etc. When you read the Koran, or autobiographies or any kind of writings, try to meditate about “the psyche” of Man. Here are examples from the Koran:
"Man prayeth for evil as he prayeth for good; for man was ever
hasty." (Al-Isra : 11)
"Lo! man was created anxious, Fretful when evil befalleth him, And, when
good befalleth him, grudging" (Al-Ma'arij: 19-21) (...)
"And if We cause man to taste some mercy from Us and afterward withdraw it from him, lo! he is despairing, thankless. And if
We cause him to taste grace after some misfortune that had befallen him, he saith: The ills have gone from me. Lo! he is exultant, boastful" (Hud : 9-10)
"And He giveth you of all ye ask of Him, and if ye would count the bounty of Allah ye cannot reckon it. Lo! man is verily a wrong doer, an
ingrate." (Ibrahim : 34)
"And when We make life pleasant unto man, he turneth away and is averse; and when ill toucheth him he is in despair." (Al-Isra : 83)
"Say (unto them): If ye possessed the treasures of the mercy of my Lord, ye would surely hold them back for fear of spending, for man was ever
grudging." (Al-Isra : 100)
"And verily We have displayed for mankind in this Quran all manner of similitudes, but man is more than anything contentious." (Al-Kahf :
54)
"Man is (self) destroyed: how ungrateful!" (Abasa : 17)
"As for man, whenever his Lord
trieth him by honoring him, and is gracious unto him, he saith: My Lord honoureth me. But whenever He trieth him by straitening his means of life, he saith: My Lord despiseth me. Nay, but ye (for
your part) honor not the orphan And urge not on the feeding of the poor, And ye devour heritages with devouring greed, And love wealth with abounding love." (Al-Fajr : 15-20)
"Lo! man is an ingrate unto his Lord, And lo! he is a witness unto that; And lo! in the love of wealth he is violent." (Al-Adiyat :
6-8)
"And He it is Who sendeth the winds, glad tidings heralding His mercy, and We send down purifying water from the sky. That We
may give life thereby to a dead land, and We give many beasts and men that We have created to drink thereof. And verily We have repeated it among them that they may remember, but most of mankind
begrudge naught save in gratitude." (Al-Furqan : 48-50)
15) Try to strengthen your belief in Fate and Destiny. Keep in mind verses like
these:
"Naught of disaster befalleth in the earth or in
yourselves but it is in a Book before We bring it into being, Lo! that is easy for Allah, That ye grieve not for the sake of that which hath escaped you, nor yet exult because of that which hath
been given. Allah loveth not all prideful boasters, Who hoard and who enjoin upon the people avarice. And whosoever turneth away, still Allah is the Absolute, the Owner of
Praise." (Al-Hadid : 22-24)
"And when We make life pleasant unto man, he turneth away and is averse; and when
ill toucheth him he is in despair." (Al-Isra : 83)
"No calamity befalleth save by Allah's leave. And whosoever believeth in Allah, He guideth his heart. And Allah is Knower
of all things." (At-Tagabun : 11)
Also read the stories of Prophets in the Koran, such as Sourat Al-Qasas.
16) Beware of dreams. If you had nice dreams in your sleep, please do not
over-interpret them. They might be good (authentic) dreams, but they might as well take too long to come true. So don’t disappoint yourself by pinning your hopes on the fulfilment of a nice dream
you saw in your sleep.
17) Give thanks to Allah for what you have already:
"And when your Lord proclaimed: If
ye give thanks, I will give you more" (Ibrahim : 7)
"And verily We gave Luqman wisdom, saying: Give thanks unto Allah; and whosoever giveth thanks, he giveth thanks for (the good of) his soul. And whosoever
refuseth, Lo! Allah is Absolute, Owner of Praise." (Luqman : 12)
"If ye are thankless, yet Allah is Independent of you, though He is not pleased with thanklessness for His bondmen; and if ye are thankful He is pleased
therewith for you. No laden soul will bear another's load. Then unto your Lord is your return; and He will tell you what ye used to do. Lo! He knoweth what is in the breasts (of
men)." (Az-Zumar : 7)
"Few of My bondmen are thankful." (Saba : 13)
"Whoso desireth the reward of the world, We bestow on him thereof and whoso desireth the reward of the Hereafter, We bestow on him thereof. We
shall reward the thankful." (Al-i'Imran : 145)
18) You will certainly be hurt and challenged (sometimes even from people who aren't necessarily better off than you), so be defiant without seeking to hurt anybody. Remember these verses:
"And he was building the ship, and every time that chieftains of his people passed him, they made mock of him. He said: Though ye make mock of us, yet we
mock at you even as ye mock" (Hud : 38)
"And We reveal of the Quran that which is a healing and a mercy for believers though it increase the evil doers in naught save ruin."
(Al-Isra : 82)
SADAQALLAHU AL'ADEIM
A woman called a doctor live on an Atlantic Radio program to ask why her three-year-old daughter still sucked at her baby's bottle (even if it were empty !). THAT IS NOT NEWS. Another listener later called to advise that woman to put something bitter in the feeding bottle or on its teat to make it disgusting to the child. He said that he had tried that out on his own daughter when she was three and it worked. THAT IS NOT NEWS, either. But then the man conceded that there arose a much bigger problem. "Now my daughter is 27 years old," he explained. "She is a university professor in a foreign country and yet she still sucks her thumb!" THAT IS NEWS, isn't it? But is it odd enough to provoke wonder in anyone?
So what provokes wonder in us? The Kenyan DAILY NATION excalimed : "It’s a mystery: Africans can’t shoot Olympic arrows!" For the author of this article "it is puzzling that Africa doesn’t dominate archery yet no other continent uses bows and arrows for primary purposes as much."
In The Unique Necklace, Ibn Abd Rabbih relates the story of a tabi'i (follower of the Prophet Muhammad's Companions) who was travelling with some of his students when they came across a drunken man singing a beautiful couplet in Arabic, something like:
My hear has become sick with love,
But there's no way to reach my love.
The tabi'i then alighted from his horse and hastened to write down those lines. Amazed, his students asked, "You write down words said by a drunken man?" The tabi'i replied: "Haven't you heard the proverb that goes 'A pearl could very well be found in the garbage.' Well, this is a pearl in a garbage!"
A man was introduced to the Abbassid caliph Harun al-Rasheed as a man of genius who could insert a hundred needles into the eyes of each other in such a way that not a single needle would fall down. The caliph asked the man to show him how he could do that, and when the latter had done that in the most brilliant manner, the caliph turned to his men, and said: "Give this man one hundred dinars and one hundred lashes." Stunned and stupefied, the genius man asked: "Majesty, I can understand why you give me one hundred dinards, but not why you give me one hundred lashes!" The caliph replied: "I give you a hundred dinars for your genius, and a hundred lashes because you wasted your genius on trivialties."
We are all intelligent, aren't we, but do we always put our intelligence to good use?
"And they marvel that a warner from among themselves hath come unto them, and the disbelievers say: This is a wizard, a charlatan. Maketh he the gods One God? Lo! that is an astounding thing." (Sad : 4-5)
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